Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Why I don't like Soup...reflection on parenting

My husband has always been frustrated with the fact that I do not really like soups or stews.  There are only a few exceptions, but on the whole, I don’t like them. Well, I think we discovered the cause:

My husband and I were talking to my parents last night about raising kids in general.  We were speculating whether our kids are going to be chill, rule followers like me, or more rambunctious like him.  The conversation led to what parents have to sacrifice to discipline their children (this may have started due to a crying baby that the parents let just cry the entire time we were in the restaurant – side note: People, if you have a crying baby, PLEASE take the baby outside until it calms down.  Some of us are trying to enjoy our meal out – and may have paid for a babysitter to have a quiet night.  Be respectful of others).

That being said, our conversation went to how my parents used to have to tag team eating dinner if either my brother or I were getting out of control.  My dad said that if we were being obnoxious in the car, he would turn the car around and then we’d have to eat dinner at home instead.  To this, my mom stated that because she loved soup and we didn’t, if we ended up coming back home, she would make soup for dinner and that was what we were stuck with.

It all became very clear why I do not like soup then!  It was punishment!  My husband always makes fun of me for my strong associations.  So I completely believe that in my young, impressionable mind, soup was a punishment and my subconscious decided that for the rest of my life I will not enjoy soup.

Of course my parents felt bad when we pointed it out.  But it’s what we do as parents, right?  In order to make your kids be behaving, contributors to society, some things end up as side effects.  So what is the harm in me not liking soup, when I’ve been raised well?  I’ve never done drugs or smoked.  I never got drunk.  I’ve never been arrested.  I work hard.  I married a wonderful man.  I consider myself raised really well, and hope to raise our kids to be the same. 

As parents, we just have to decide if we’re willing to make sacrifices to make our kids better.  And we have to accept we will “scar them for life” (as I told my parents about not getting an Easter basket one year), but that it is worth it in the end to raise good kids.


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